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Transformers 3 - Dark Of The Moon

Created by dave. Last edited by dave, 4 years and 174 days ago. Viewed 1,729 times. #3
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(2014-06-09)

So for years I went to see maybe one movie a year, and for the most part I never wanted to see anything else that was in the previews. I could pick out the one movie months in advance and have a pretty good idea that it would be a good movie.

Jenn and I have been going to movies monthly (or more frequently, last little while) and for whatever reason there seemed to be more movies in the previews I was wanting to see. And my question was: is exposure to the previews increasing the number of movies I am aware of, therefore increasing the number of movies I wanted to see -- or was exposure to the previews lowering my standards for what would constitute an acceptable movie?

This becomes relevant because the previews for Transformers 4 looked like it had the potential to be a good movie. And Jenn said not to get my hopes up because she'd been watching Transformers 2 on an airplane -- where it was free, available, and there was a lot of time that needed killing -- and despite all that, she'd still turned it off.

So in the run up to Transformers 4, Transformers 3 made it on to TV. To whet everyone's appetite or something. So we recorded it, because how bad could it really be?

And:

A) My god, this is terrible. I mean, not *terrible* terrible, but still terrible; and

B) Jenn says this is *better* than Transformers 2.

I was pre-disposed towards liking this movie. I wanted to like this movie. High tech robots clobbering everyone? Leonard Nimoy? My history of watching the original animated Transformers? All biases in favor of this movie. It created a very, very low bar to clear. And it failed to do so. Heck, it smashed through the barrier like it was a truck that couldn't jump.

There's so much wrong with this movie I don't know what to say. How about:

  • none of the apollo missions went to "the dark side" of the moon;
  • it isn't "the dark side"; you might call it "the far side" if you are earth-centric, but really the only thing you can call it is "the other side";
  • some guy had a nice model of a Saturn-V rocket on his desk -- in 1961, before the rocket had been developed;
  • none of the astronauts noticed the tracks around the crashed alien spaceship? There's no erosion on the moon to wear tracks like that away;
  • when the Autobots go to the moon, there's a nice apollo lander sitting there -- including the part that should have left with the astronauts when they returned to the orbiter
...and that's enough for now.

The end orgy of violence in Chicago was incomprehensible to me. I could not follow who was doing what, let alone allegedly why.

I'm watching it for free and frankly I'm paying too much.

So now Transformers 4 is off the table for the theatre. I may give it a try on TV when it comes out, but based on what I recall of Transformers 1, Jenn's abandonment of Transformers 2, and… THIS… well I don't see how I can justify spending money on it.

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